Over the past year, I’ve met countless readers who have the same suggestion for MWF 2.0: Couple Dates!
When you’re married, finding couple friends is tough. I’ve written about this before–first, the difficulties of locking down couple friends, then why couple friends are so important. Matt and I have made most of our couple friends because one of us is friends with someone in the other couple, and then we decide to make it a foursome. We’ve also met some couples as a pair, at weddings or other functions.
But despite having gone on many, many, blind friend-dates, I’ve never been on a blind couple-date. I bring this up because a friend told me that she and her fiance were set up on a blind couple-date over the weekend. A mutual friend of the men in these couples wanted to introduce them, but he thought a man-date might be uncomfortable. So instead, he set them up as pairs.
Though I’ve never actually tried it, it seems to me that a blind couple date would be far more awkward than a blind friend-date, no matter your gender. Here’s why: There are going to be awkward moments at the beginning of a friend-date. Even if the date is a rousing success, during those first few moments there will be forced small talk or longer-than-ideal moments of silence. When it’s just the two of you, that’s not so awkward. It’s to be expected. But it’s hard to be your blind-date self in front of the person who knows you best in the world. If Matt and I went on a blind couple-date, I can just hear him saying to me on the car ride home, “why were you acting so weird at the beginning??”
Also, blind dates are hard enough when there are just two people. Imagine how much harder it will be to hit it off sight-unseen when there are four of you. At least on a normal couple date, the two who know each other can help break the ice. “Matt, you and Eric are both Red Sox fans” or “Rachel, you and Julia both love So You Think You Can Dance.” Or, at the very least ,the two who know each other will start off from a place of familiarity. It just seems so much easier that way.
Of course, I’ve been known to over-analyze things and make everything more awkward than it is. My friend in question said her blind couple-date was perfectly fine, and didn’t complain of any huge hiccups. So what do I know?
So what do you think? Ever been on a blind couple date? Think it would be harder than a blind friend date? Or easier?
MWF Seeking BFF 
I haven’t been on a blind couple date, but my other half and I often end up out together making friends as a couple. He’s used to me acting weird by now I guess! I would have thought that more people means less awkward silence because you have more chit chat to go through.
I haven’t, but I would expect less awkwardness because you have your other half there to play off of. Of course, that could wind up leading to a different kind of awkwardness if you fall back on talking to your partner if engaging the other couple is too difficult.
Ooh, that’s a good point!
Yes, still have a trauma from that 🙂
I’m going to have to agree with the first two comments. Mike, my boyfriend would definitely be easy to bounce stories off of or we could make fun of each other in spite of ourselves if we needed an ice breaker. Plus, if one of us is having a hard time with our “match” we could tag team and get in the ring to help out. If it’s super awkward, it might be better to have another perspective that otherwise wouldn’t be there. For instance if, say, the guy doesn’t like sports.
We recently went on a couple blind date with a couple that reached out to me through a Meet Up group. It was actually really great, and we have been trying to hang out at least once a month.
It is nice because the friendship isn’t skewed by dependence on a relationship between two members of the foursome to sustain it. The friendship is fairly balanced among the four of us.
I didn’t think to call it a blind date at the time, but that’s exactly what it was.
this is a book that you must do! but please keep the over analyzing and whining in check, thank you.
That is super rude to say. She has a right to write what she wants and you have a right to choose to read it or not read it.
I agree that I think a “couple” blind date would be pretty awkward. It’s such a hard endeavor though to find couple friends that both you and your husband like.. especially if you and your husband have pretty different interests (like me and my hubby). Love reading your posts on couple friends – I’m a new follower and I’m loving your blog! 🙂
This sounds SO awkward – but it’s worth a shot. Sometimes these funny or uncomfortable situations can give you something to joke and laugh about to decrease the tension!
Don’t bother with total “blind couple dates” and try the various websites available online to help couples find couple friends. If you find a couple on a site you at least have a clue what they like and dislike before you hangout with them. There are several sites out there like http://www.coupleslist.com and http://www.hangbase.com, as well as others.
Hi Desi, Pardesi or Whatever Girl!Good that you got the intention of the post clear. [You’d have raeisd a war otherwise ]However, it seems you failed to understand the depth of the post. It’s on love and not on organ donation. All that the post intends to convey is: Love without expecting anything in return.Your comment sounds self contradictory. You say the intention is good but then you doubt it. You seem to be raising a war against gender disparity but then you are fuelling it.Remember, both genders are made to love, not to fight with one another. So, for God’s sake, don’t turn this post into a gender war.