Very cute! I think it’s true, but in a good way. We love our long-time friends because we’ve stayed together despite our flaws. It’s too late to turn back. We’re stuck with each other now.
I am obsessed with someecards, by the way. So happy to see I’m not the only one!
i don’t think it’s so much about laziness. i think it’s about the strength of the friendship. i’d want to be golden girls with my closest girl friends, especially my bff because we all “get” each other and have so much history. we care about each other too.
I agree too, but not necessarily in a negative way. Proximity is a big factor getting to know people (think of coworkers who become your friends when you didn’t necessarily start out looking for friends at work), so it’s easy to stay friends with people who are in our normal routine. And it takes more work to go out of our normal routines to find new people to be friends with. Not impossible to do, just harder.
The other side is as we get older, the fear of no friends holds more gravity..Lonliness is something to dread, and by as certain age, you truly understand that…
I love having friends, and I do enjoy making new friends, but people are so complex that you can spend a whole lifetime just getting to really know one person. I don’t think that’s being lazy; I think it’s cultivating a deep friendship.
Best world is to have a mix of long-time friends who are supportive but are honest for at least half of a person’s life and some more newer friends for different facets of your life.
And remember some of your siblings are your close friends too –for life.
So weird you are writing about this stuff – not sure whether it is because I am inching closer towards the big 4 0 or what, but I have started thinking about this kind of stuff too.
The whole concept of friends forever is something that Liz Pryor covered in her book “What did I do wrong” (re womens’ tendency to avoid their closest friend when breaking up with them) – I think she or perhaps one of the researchers she quoted said that it is a mythical concept as we all evolve and life moves on.
To me lifelong friendship is about is rare as lifelong marriage – sure there are plenty that exist, but are they friendships that are genuinely solid? Are they the kind where you are each other’s best & worst critics and able to love unconditionally? Saying you are lifelong friends without those things is just the same as saying you have been married for 40 years but arent companions/each others best friends and still in love. The years mean nothing if they dont have the foundation to back them up.
I think that as women get older – and lose many of their close friends – it is hard/scary to try to make new ones. I have a couple of terrific, sociable relatives in their 80’s who are in exactly that position, and are very lonely. I’ve given them your book, Rachel, but it is difficult for an 80+ woman to see herself in your 20’s experiences. Perhaps a possibility for your next book?
I think we’ll be friends forever because nobody else will put up with us for long….
Very cute! I think it’s true, but in a good way. We love our long-time friends because we’ve stayed together despite our flaws. It’s too late to turn back. We’re stuck with each other now.
I am obsessed with someecards, by the way. So happy to see I’m not the only one!
i don’t think it’s so much about laziness. i think it’s about the strength of the friendship. i’d want to be golden girls with my closest girl friends, especially my bff because we all “get” each other and have so much history. we care about each other too.
Ha – amazing. And, also, the Golden Girls rule. Miss you already, Berch!
I think there is defo a little bit of truth in that, I know some friends that this is the case – but not all!!!
I agree too, but not necessarily in a negative way. Proximity is a big factor getting to know people (think of coworkers who become your friends when you didn’t necessarily start out looking for friends at work), so it’s easy to stay friends with people who are in our normal routine. And it takes more work to go out of our normal routines to find new people to be friends with. Not impossible to do, just harder.
Funny because it’s true. There’s an element to laziness in friendship (better called inertia maybe)
But it’s also hard to truly say “We’re not friends anymore” about people even if you see them rarely.
The other side is as we get older, the fear of no friends holds more gravity..Lonliness is something to dread, and by as certain age, you truly understand that…
I love having friends, and I do enjoy making new friends, but people are so complex that you can spend a whole lifetime just getting to really know one person. I don’t think that’s being lazy; I think it’s cultivating a deep friendship.
Best world is to have a mix of long-time friends who are supportive but are honest for at least half of a person’s life and some more newer friends for different facets of your life.
And remember some of your siblings are your close friends too –for life.
A bit of both unfortunately
So weird you are writing about this stuff – not sure whether it is because I am inching closer towards the big 4 0 or what, but I have started thinking about this kind of stuff too.
The whole concept of friends forever is something that Liz Pryor covered in her book “What did I do wrong” (re womens’ tendency to avoid their closest friend when breaking up with them) – I think she or perhaps one of the researchers she quoted said that it is a mythical concept as we all evolve and life moves on.
To me lifelong friendship is about is rare as lifelong marriage – sure there are plenty that exist, but are they friendships that are genuinely solid? Are they the kind where you are each other’s best & worst critics and able to love unconditionally? Saying you are lifelong friends without those things is just the same as saying you have been married for 40 years but arent companions/each others best friends and still in love. The years mean nothing if they dont have the foundation to back them up.
P.s so yep – funny haha & funny because it’s true!!! 🙂
Reblogged this on Imabookworm08's Blog and commented:
“Birds of the same feather tends to be stupid together”haha:))
Reblogged this on Imabookworm08's Blog and commented:
“Birds of the same feather tends to be stupid together”haha:))
i’ll reblog this one. ’twas funny and reminds me of this one crazy quote that “Birds of the same feather tends to be stupid together”haha:))
I think that as women get older – and lose many of their close friends – it is hard/scary to try to make new ones. I have a couple of terrific, sociable relatives in their 80’s who are in exactly that position, and are very lonely. I’ve given them your book, Rachel, but it is difficult for an 80+ woman to see herself in your 20’s experiences. Perhaps a possibility for your next book?