I know my friends pretty well. The high school, camp and college pals that I write about? I feel like I could ace the quiz about their backgrounds. If we were on Survivor and we had to compete in one of those challenges where the pair who knows each other best gets to eat peanut butter and chocolate and helicopter to a remote island while the rest of the contestants have to go back to the shelter, make fire, and fight over uncooked rice, well, I think we’d dominate.
But there’s no better way to get a new perspective on your BFFs than to hear an outsider’s take. I’m not talking some random girl who talks smack because she’s still bitter your best friend beat her out for the captain of the cheerleading squad. I’m talking about the observers who have nothing personally invested.
Maybe it’s more accurate to say that I love getting new perspective from outsiders who adore my friends. If some random stranger hated one of my pals, I wouldn’t give her opinion much credit. But when someone random starts telling you why your BFF is the best–she’s so funny, she’s so smart, she’s so savvy–it’s fun to take a step back and say “Yes! You’re so right. She’s all those things.”
For example, one of my dearest friends is a girl that everyone loves. Why wouldn’t they? She’s silly and smart, caring and strong. My mother-in-law might like her more than she likes me. (I kid.) (Or not.) Guys are always asking her out, girls want to be her friend. Imagine my luck that I actually am her friend. Every single time I meet someone who knows her in any capacity we have a mutual love fest where they tell me about how funny she is, or hard working, or spunky. You get it: She’s adored.
The other day I started talking to a 23-year-old assistant at a business meeting. Turns out she’s from the same town as this bestie, though they didn’t go to the same high school. When I mentioned that my best friend was moving in with a guy who is also from their town, and actually went to the same high school as the 23-year-old, this girl freaked out. Apparently my friend is moving in with The Hot Senior From High School. “He drove a Jeep!” the 23-year-old told me, as if this single fact told me all I needed to know about his level of cool.
I called my friend immediately, so excited to tell her that her boyfriend is Super Dreamy, according to the girls six years younger. The whole thing made me giggle. The assistant’s smitten-ness, the fact that my friend is dating That Guy, and the idea that from where this assistant was standing, my friend is the coolest girl on the block for snagging him.
The point of this story, as it turns out, is that this couple is way too cute. But also that it’s fun to watch others get all lovey about our BFFs. Like a proud mama bear, we just want to show them off. To say “I know right?! She’s so cool. And she actually chose to be friends with me!”
Ever been there? Or am I totally loony?
I completely agree! At my wedding – which was in Cabo so people had lots of time to hang out with each other – I had the pleasure of having my very best friends spend a lot of time with my family. Every day I heard from a new family member how awesome this girl is, or how interesting another is. I was so proud I beamed! It’s a great feeling to have someone else see exactly what you see, and know that the world appreciates the incredible women in our lives!
Totally! My high school BFF is ah-mazing. She’s cool, smart, sassy, easy-going, and, yep, gorgeous. At my wedding, she and my college BFF were fast friends in minutes, which made the whole bridal party experience a lot more fun. I beam with pride every time my hubby says, “I like that girl. More friends like that one, if you please.” However, I have a new potential BFF that I’m really rooting for and while my hubby likes her, others I’ve introduced are not so taken. And I cannot figure out why–she’s also smart, out-going, successful, sociable and fun. What are they seeing that I don’t?
I feel this way everyday when I read the comments from your fans!!!
But what if it’s the opposite? What if your casual friends aren’t a huge fan of your bff and reluctantly point out the reasons why?
Oof. I’m with Liz on the last one. Everybody is always eyerolling at one of my best friends–including my husband.
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