Agree or disagree? Do tell.
Me, I believe it.
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I totally agree, if my friends are too kind I wonder if somebody told them I’m dying & they’re feeling sorry for me.
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I agree, good friends aren’t afraid to poke fun at each other and have a laugh. But good friends also know when they have gone too far, or better yet, they know where to stop before going too far.
I agree! The more I like someone, the more comfortable I feel to tease them. If I’m very polite, it means I’m awkward and don’t like them much
Totally agree! I was just visiting home over the weekend and was at brunch with my two best friends and I randomly realized that since I moved to Chicago I haven’t been made fun of because my friends are too new. I miss it!
I totally agree! And if I don’t have that, then I am taking life way too seriously!
As long as they know the difference between affectionate teasing and just being cruel. I don’t think it’s vital but it’s common.
I disagree. A true friend is kind, and making fun of somebody is not kind. As Sarah said, affectionate teasing is one thing, but sarcasm and mockery have no place in friendship. When we say things “in jest” that would sound or be perceived as unkind or even cruel if we weren’t “kidding” when we say them to our “friends,” we are harming the other person.
If it is an inside joke that you know the other person will understand as not mean but might sound mean to onlookers who don’t know you then it is funny, but otherwise I am not a big fan. Often people don’t admit that it really does sting because they don’t want to seem overly sensitive but are secretly wondering if maybe you really weren’t joking.
I have a neurological disease that causes me to shake, and one of my favorite things to do is to make my friends laugh (not about the shaking.) In Michael J. Fox’s book where he talks about his Parkinson’s, he (who also loves to make others laugh) says that it is really awkward and uncomfortable when people are so focused on your symptoms that they can’t see past them and act like a normal friend would, laughing at you.
and laughing with you.
And old friends are still laughing at you for the same things 40 years later! That’s real friendship!
I love any person’s reaction and honesty…it reflects their live more than the receivers.
I think this is absolutely true of GOOD friends. I have had to avoid contact with one person who was incomprehensibly insensitive and inappropriate about what she thought were jokes.
I think there’s a line that is drawn where friendly joking crosses over to hurtful remarks that you just know we’re meant to get under your skin. But I can spot them from a mile away and choose to walk away from the not-so-friendly friendship. People like that are generally insecure and just want to drag you down with them.
I agree, you know your comfortable with someone when you can tease them and accept their teasing. And you know you know each other well to even know why it’s funny in the first place.
My friend (slash coworker) swears that the first time I made fun of her (no idea what I said, but I do remember her reaction: “Oh, we’re there now? Okay then.”) was a milestone in our friendship. Knowing precisely what’s fair game and what’s off-limits is part of showing how well you know your friend.
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