It’s Research Wednesday! Where I share the latest, or most fascinating, in the science of friendship.
“According to the study, two fifths [of women] admitted to needing their friend’s approval [in a romantic relationship,] whilst 12% would even end a relationship if their pals didn’t approve.” (“Tenth of Women Would Dump Boyfriend if Friends ‘Didn’t Approve’” ; Female First 5/10/2012)
I don’t know that I’ve ever seen any of these twelve percent in action. I’ve seen friendships end when a pal doesn’t approve of a romantic interest, but never the other way around.
I know there are some women who might not pursue a guy that her BFF doesn’t approve of. And if a bestie revealed that a guy was cheating or some such horribleness, I’d like to think the pal would act on that information and end things. But I’ve never seen a friend say, “You know what my darling friend, that guy you’re dating is a jerk and you should dump his sorry ass,” and have it end in anything other than a girl fight.
The study, which was conducted by the double dating site Date With a Mate, surveyed 1,193 women across the UK — so it’s possible that this kind of “sisters over misters” (yeah, I said it) is more common across the pond. But I doubt it.
Here are some more numbers to come out of the research:
- When asked if they needed their friends approval when they started dating a new person, more than two fifths, 42%, of respondents answered ‘yes’. (This seems more accurate. We’re more interested in our friends’ opinions before we fall for someone.)
- Only 8% of the respondents said that they would end a new relationship if their mother didn’t approve. (I guess moms aren’t the same as BFFs after all.)
- 14% of respondents said a friendship has ended after a friend didn’t approve of the partner.
- 89% of respondents said it was important that their friends ‘approved’ of their new relationship. But only 59% of the respondents said that they believed it was important that their new partner’s friends like them.
- 21% of the respondents said that they felt nervous when introducing a new partner to their friends
Any of this research suprise you? Or stricke a chord? Have you ever ended a relationship because your BFF didn’t approve?